Monday, April 16, 2012

Misadventure of a Repentant Drama Queen

Why oh why oh why did I do it again?

I let this motor mouth of mine override whatever common sense I have.

I'll be busy for the next few days because of a promise I made, and I have no one to blame for it but my own self.

You see, about a month ago, someone from my hometown called and asked me do a little favor. What I thought she wanted me to do was give a tour of my favorite historical home and tell the story of the Curse of Lorenzo Dow.   




I yakked all about that HERE.

That's what I thought she was asking...

And so I said yes. She didn't even have to talk me into it. For one thing, I'm kind of remedial with that whole "just say no" thing. For another, it's a pretty easy fit for me, and it sounded fun. I love the story; I love the house, and apparently I love the sound of my own voice yakking about it.

Vanity thy name is Debbie.

And then, the other shoe dropped. It wasn't a tour, you see. It's more of a performance.  It wasn't to be done safely sequestered behind the walls of the old house, either.  Oh noooo... I will be making a fool of myself smack dab in the middle of town.

Right in front of God and everybody...

In historical costume no less...
Just not enough costume so as to render me incognito.

The Farm Sister has been making said costume since she's a better seamstress. Plus, she laughed at me and is trying to get back in my good graces. I told her she didn't have to make a bustle or hoop since I have those things built right in. I'm convenient like that.


Does anyone know if they still make those whale bone corsets?
Pull, Sister, Pull!

So anyway, if you don't see my flower cart until later in the week, just know that I'm very busy and very stressed out. Not only do I have to finish writing my dramatic little monologue, but I also have to memorize it.

And practice it.

And lose 50 pounds, one of my chins,  and the built- in bustle.

And of course, fit in time to highlight my hair. 'Cause you know how those historical women loved their  blond highlights... 

Good grief.

Can anyone relate? 
Has your vanity ever gotten in the way your common sense?




44 comments:

Susan (My Place to Yours) said...

I don't know whether to laugh at (um, WITH, I meant WITH) you or cry for you! My mouth is laughing but my heart is crying... Is that okay? Maybe it's because I have myself in a public pinch right now, too (albeit one that is less dramatic, thank goodness). I don't know when your deadline is, but I'm praying, "Lord, get me through Saturday!" I never dreamed I'd be waiting on Little Sir for two weeks when I committed to be a vendor at a fashion show/luncheon fundraiser event -- and now I'm laundering and ironing linens and packing dishes like a crazy fool. Oh, and on top of that this is the week I have to work with my committee to complete the church's policies and procedures manual. WHEN will we ever learn?

Good luck, my friend. I promise to pray (and chuckle) you through this one!

Crickit said...

This is wonderful! I know you will do great! I hope that you will post some pics of the event! :)

Denise said...

Sweety, you will do a wonderful job, praying for you.

renee @ Singing With Birds said...

All I know is that I'm really looking forward to your next post! AND yes oh yes, I've gotten into hot water way over my head many, many times, so I am chuckling out here in Idaho and feeling your pain. Time to pull on your "big-girl Spanx'" (just teasing cause I know how much you like to exaggerate your midlife middle) and have a great time. You were born for this, maybe more than you know! Take lots of pix, please.

Barbara F. said...

I think you will give a stellar performance! And you will look beautiful in period costume, with or without new highlights (you could always wear a bonnet ;-)!) Will it be taped? xo

Sooner Laura said...

Have fun with it - too late now to do anything else right? And can't wait to see the costume pics!

Tracy said...

Oh my, perhaps when the overwhelming feeling of having to get it all done passes, you will actually be able to enjoy the entire process...or at least that is what I am hoping for you...
:)

Kelley said...

I'm chuckling WITH both you and Susan. Sorry. And I'm jealous that I won't get to participate with either Susan's linens or your corset-tying. SUCK IN!

Chatty Crone said...

I am not sure it is vanity. I think you just have a hard time saying no because you are a wonderful person. I have that problem. So you just be yourself - you are a wonderful person JUST THE WAY YOU ARE! So go and have fun. I'll be praying. YOU WILL DO GREAT!
Love, sandie

Debbie said...

Oh my goodness, while this does sound a bit overwhelming, HOW FUN!! I'd love to see and hear the whole thing. You should have somebody video you doing this so you can share with all of us!! I just know you'll do great. Looking forward to at least some pics! ENJOY

Kathleen said...

Well, I know you'll do a great job and I'm certainly looking forward to reading all about it. Good luck!

Gaby said...

Has vanity ever gotten the best of me, you ask??? Hmmmm....letmethinkaboutthatYESYESYES!

But please take pictures. I bet you will be adorable. And...when you are all done I will be waiting for that post on parenting you kindofsortof promised on my blog ;) (And you can't say no because...well because apparently you can't! I just had to get that in).

Kim @ Stuff could... said...

You write very interesting posts...yeah my mouth does get in the way, too often:) common sense???

Carol said...

Aaahhhh! I know how you feel, I can relate. But I think at the end of it, you'll be terrific. Wish I could come and watch.
Do post pictures. We all want to see them.

Gina said...

LOL! Ok, maybe I shouldn't be laughing because my mouth has gotten me into trouble in the past, too! But the whole losing a chin part sounded like something I would say!

Here's what I think, you write your blog so beautifully, I think you'll be able to pull this off without any problem at all....big built in bustle & all!

Lynn Richards said...

"Sure, why not?" has been eliminated from my vocabulary for such reasons as yours. I can, and have gotten up in front of people, but NEVER in a corset and NEVER having to memorize lines. Honey, that's against the law once we turn 50. Don't people understand this???
Will be praying for much grace and laughter.
xo
lynn

Maryann said...

I still have a hard time saying no, so yup been there done that. I actually think you are gonna do great...I love the idea that there is a costume involved, please post pictures

Tanna at The Brick Street Bungalow said...

Oh, Debbie, you will be WONDERFUL! I do so wish I could be there to cheer you on in this performance. Be our Stellar Star!! blessings and hugs ~ tanna

ps thank you from the bottom of my heart for your prayers and your words of encouragement. I will be forever grateful. Thank you.

Janette@Janette's Sage said...

I am laughing too hard!!!!!!! I am a first born, not a second, therefore, I don't want to be on stage, I just direct!

I would so love to tell hubby we need a vacation and hop in the car and come that way to experience all of it.

You Go Girl...I just wish I had your nerve...I think that is just great!!!

Enjoy, yak, yak,...and receive all the applause...I have already started clapping and cheering from Texas

Denise said...

How do we get ourselves into these messes??? I'm a stressin' about this costume as much as you are about the performance. So thankful I don't have to perform. Let's don't forget I am notorious for forgetting my lines. I don't know how you will perform and use the shiny red Kodak simultaneously. Just sayin'...

And, you don't have two chins so if you lose one, you'll look peculiar. Good luck or rather break a leg Wednesday.

Happier Than a Pig in Mud said...

The only thing I know with certainty is-you'll be great! Deep breath, have fun and what the heck, highlight the hair for giggles:@)

Sue said...

Oh my ~ but I know you will be great! And I'm sure they had blonde highlights way back when.
{will there be pictures for the blog?} {just wondering}

The Polka Dot Closet said...

Oh, I hate public speaking, I did sales for 20 years and decided when I quit that I would never do it again.....So...I totally get it, this too will pass. Make the best and enjoy it if you can! I can't wait for the pictures!!

Carol

Miss Char said...

I can relate to the fear, the extra chin, the 50 lbs. etc. but to actually give in to doing it.. NOPE I can't relate. Bless your heart for taking this on Debbie, I know you'll be great in your period costume and highlighted hair, hee hee hee.

Shanee @ LivingLifeSouthernStyle said...

Bless your heart! You will be great :) I don't think I suffer from vanity issues as much as the too large a mouth, too small ears syndrome and end up in the same type messes. Thankfully they always seem to work out well and I am sure yours will too. Breath deep (well as deep as your corset will allow) and enjoy.

Kathryn Ross said...

Fear not, my little reluctant historical re-enactor - you shall be impressive, I am sure.

So long as you DON'T say, "period COSTUME" in the earshot of a sold out re-enactor. That is a no-no. Very insulting. The correct term is "period ATTIRE".

Just sayin'.

I would love to be there - truly!!!! I've got two dresses to get pulled together for my annual event on May 18-19 - and our annual Civil War Ball on August 4 requires a more dressy wardrobe.

As to the corset - oh, yes - you can get them - very much the thing at Ren Faires - but, I believe you jest in your inquiry. Don't really need one if you have your dress fitted to you. I leave the corsets to the teen and twenty somethings.

Lilacs - YES! But, too late for a branch from grandma's tree. Doubt if I could coax a rooting out of it anyway. What I planted a few years ago is growing fine and that's enough to be going on with.

Do post pictures of your town square performance - and close ups of the dress!!!

Joy!
Kathy

Ann said...

I wish I were closer, I'd love to help your sister with the dress! Hannah wants me to make one for her ... and I've had the patterns for eons .... just haven't set aside the right amount of time to begin ... sigh.

You will do well! I just know it. If you talk as well as you write, you will have a truly captive and captivated audience! Wish I were there.

Cheers!

Rettabug said...

You cannot imagine how much I would LOVE to witness your performance in person, Debbie! With your gift of gab, you'll do great, Honey...built in bustle & all! LOL

I sure hope someone will take some photos so we can see you in full costume, along with the house, too.
Our little historic town does something similar each year & it has RAINED every single time I've planned to go. Phooey!

Good luck...er, I mean "break a leg"
Hugs,
Rett

Tanna at The Brick Street Bungalow said...

thank you, Debbie. thank you. your sweet words just made me cry. i am blessed to have you for my prayer warrior. and, i am forever grateful. t.

Francie...The Scented Cottage Studio said...

Now you KNOW you will knock 'em dea... ummm out ! and geee you shoulda emailed me, I have a couple of outfits all ready made.
You WILL share photos right?

(())

Angel said...

Oh boy, can I relate! I am in the throws of an overcommitment right now and my to do list sounds eerily similar to yours. But thanks to you and your "dramatic little monologue" I have enjoyed a good laugh and a realization that I'm not alone. So please accept a great big THANK YOU from your fellow crazed blog friend!

Mevely317 said...

I'm applauding and chuckling at the same time ... hee-hee. No doubt in my head, you're gonna SHINE! (Just puleeeeze, pose for a picture or two?)

I loved the story of Katie Belle's twins. Mary's twinkle is priceless..... despite her having lost her best friend. What a blessing to know her!

Babs said...

I'm laughing so hard at your upcoming hysterical..I mean historical performance. I do hope someone takes photos. I'd love to see you in costume. Which dress style did you chose? Are you wearing a bonnet? :) giggle.
Hugs,
Babs

xinex said...

Oh Debbie, you will be so pretty in one of those southern belle gowns. Show us a picture,ok?....Christine

Sharon said...

Oh please tell me there are going to be pictures.

Debbie, only you can tell a story like this. You make me laugh so much, and then I feel guilty for laughing!!

As far as the last question you asked - can I relate? Oh my goodness, yes. I'm not sure if vanity has always been the culprit - but I can't tell you how many times I have opened my mouth and said something dumb (often times the something dumb was "Yes") - and lived to regret it.

Of course, the answer to your second question - Can't really say yes to that one, because your question implies that I have common sense...

Historical women - blond highlights. I don't know how historical you are, but you sure are hysterical!

xoxo

Linda (More Fun Less Laundry) said...

First of all, you must be sure to record your performance. I'll be looking for it on an upcoming post!! Secondly, please be sure to make Mr. Dow look good so no curse is called down upon your head or house! Seems like he was quite effective! Have a wonderful time--I'm sure you'll be great! Linda

Debbiedoo's said...

Oh Miss Debbie Dear!~ Classic case here of insert foot in mouth NOW! I can't wait to hear all about it. I bet you will have fun when all is said and done. Honestly can't say I ever did that..HUH! So not true, I make a fool of myself on a daily basis.

laurie @ bargain hunting said...

Oh how I wish I could be there to see this! It will be wonderful! I do hope we'll see a picture of you in your historical dress. I know EXACTLY what you're talking about. I have such a hard time saying no. I'm usually flattered that I'm bein asked~at least up until the time when I actually have to follow through. Better yet, you need someone to video it, so you can show the entire presentation on your blog. I know it's going to be soooo great! When is it? I'll say a prayer for you. (I also know a lot about being nervous). laurie

Red Couch Recipes said...

Loved the line "I'm convenient like that." I have always wanted to be a reenactor! Sounds like a ton of fun. I just saw an old Tammy movie where she reenacted an old Southern Belle. I hope you have warmed up your accent. Good luck! Joni

Knitty said...

I am in a similar pickle. Despite my brain screaming NO, my mouth said YES and the one requesting the favor didn't hear the sarcasm, thinking I would truly love to do what I am doing. Which at this very moment is procrastinating.

We could write lectures for others on how to say no to others. The problem is that we'd be ask to go on a lecture tour and how could we possibly turn those nice people down?

The Decorative Dreamer said...

You go girl! I am sure you will be fantastic in your new role and only wish we could all see it too. Who knows you might even be discovered by a secret Hollywood agent (lurking in your town square) who leads you on to many more future leading roles. Hehe! I think it's great to step out of our comfort levels from time to time. It's how we grow. You are going to be great, I just know it! Now I have to run, I want to read up on that house tour I missed. Best wishes on your performance and can't wait to hear how it went!

FrouFrouBritches said...

Oh, I have so been there! You see, since I should've been an actress, I think I can do things like that, but when it comes down to doing it live and in person, not so much. Now, if it were me, I'd be much better doing it front of a camera crew. I'm a total ham in front of the camera, but not so much in the live audience.

Can't wait to read how it turns out. Hope you include pictures of the costume.

Alycia Nichols said...

Here's my take on the whole thing: Relax and enjoy it! Do you really think anyone there is going to be concentrating on the few extra pounds you've earned over a lifetime? I say "earned" because when we get to be "of a certain age", we have endured much to get here. Every pound, every line, every gray hair, every age spot...earned! If you want to drop some weight to feel better and get a little healthier (keeping in mind that there are many curvy gals who are still "healthy" in a medical sense), do it. Toss the vanity right out the window, though. Don't you deserve to have fun and enjoy all that life has to offer? SURE, you do! AND, you do want to educate people, right? They will be so enthralled with your story and your performance that you needn't worry a moment that they are thinking, "Wow...she should have put on some Spanx this morning!" Their minds will be focused on YOU as the learned and entertaining presenter! Do it, and have fun! And yes...we want pictures!!!! :-)

Manuela@A Cultivated Nest said...

LOL! Oh my....I don't know what I'd do. Goodness!

Well, I'm sure you'll pull it together and me just fantastic!

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