Tuesday, May 4, 2010

The Morton's Salt Girl

Miss Whimsy wears glasses.

Actually, she wears contacts, but she has glasses.

Half inch coke bottle lenses in stylish black frames.

She’s as blind as a bat.

And I am ashamed to admit (but I will of course) that she needed those glasses long before she actually got them. I received a big fat “F” on that particular Mommy Test. I thought that she was faking.

Now, in my defense, The Whimsy was a well known faker. We had to keep a suspicious eye on any headache, tummy ache, or fit of dizziness for the ulterior motive. That was the first reason that I suspected fraud. The second was timing. This eyesight lamentation appeared to be in direct response to her  friend's new pair of eyeglasses.

 A beautiful pair… with little kittens on the side… or so it was reported to me. Repeatedly.

So I figured that the issue at hand was not at all about the eye sight but about the fashion statement.

I told her to sit near the chalkboard and squint.

Some months later, our local Service League volunteered to do eye examinations at our school, and Miss Whimsy was delighted to report that she was given “the note.” Her teacher phoned that evening, and she said, "Now Debbie, I think you should take her to the eye doctor, but you should probably know that she was handing out high fives as she emerged from the examination room. I have a strong hunch that she failed that test deliberately."

So I took her to the ophthalmologist, and I whispered to him that what we had was a  possible case of  fashion fraud of the copycat kind. He assured me that they had ways of sorting truth from fiction.

And they did. Miss Whimsy, he reported, was in dire need of spectacles.

At the end of the examination, the doctor looked at me and laughed. “I’ve been doing this for many years,” he said, “and I have never seen a kid so excited about a pair of eyeglasses.”

So we picked out a pair... with little kittens on the side. She was delighted.

Well, the newness eventually wore off. She has been wearing contacts for years, but periodically, she sports the specs, more for the fashion statement than anything else.

Now, you might be wondering what set me off on my ramble this morning...

Well, it's this:

Today was our first rainy school day since Easter, and it's kind of miserable out there. But when Miss Whimsy opened those blind eyes, the first thing that she said was, “Is that rain?” And she hopped out of bed, giddy with excitement. She showered and dressed and skipped down the stairs with a big goofy grin and twinkling eyes.

As we closed the door on our goodbyes, Super Dad just shook his head and chuckled. And he said, “I never saw a kid so excited about a pair of eye glasses.”

I giggled back because I knew exactly what he meant.

Only today, it was a new pair of these:

Rain boots...with little whales on the side.

And that's one of the 4,726 reasons that I love the kid. When life gives her showers, she puts on her happy boots and dances in the rain.


Amy Kinser said...

You are such a great story teller.

Sorry that she has such poor vision. My son has depth perception problems and is going to an eye specialist. We struggled with sixteen years not knowing why certain things were such problems for him. We even had an eye dr. tell us the problem, but tell us there was no fix. God showed us otherwise. We are now on the road to better vision, able to see 3D movies, able to drive better, etc...

Tell your daughter I love her rain boots. So cute.

Dayle Allen Shockley said...

I'll never forget when my twin sister and I first got glasses in elementary school. My mother said we walked down the street reading signs, giddy with excitement. At last! We could see!

Lynn Richards said...

How can you have a bad day with a gal like yours??? Awesome. I would be pretty dang happy if I had a pair of boots like that myself. Yes I would. They sell them at Target, but I never get them because it doesn't rain that much here. Hah. Next year, I'm getting me and Miss B some boots so we can dance together!!!

Nancy said...

What a sweet post and what a wonderful way of telling stories you have!

Yvonne @ StoneGable said...

Debbie, I love your touching and sweet story. Everyone should remember the joyful spirit of Miss Whimsy! And I love our 29 day sf giving!
Blessings to you!

Anonymous said...

How well I remember the the little peanut head with those "special" glasses!! Let's don't forget if we don't have a faker on our hands, we have the child that wants to be "different" so she can gather some attention. I think five years of that awful back brace cured her of some of that stuff. Or thinking back on her recent wedding...maybe not. As always, cute post.

Jennie said...

This makes me smile...because it reminds me of my Abby. When life gives you rain, just put on your new rain boots. (duh) Those were the best Easter basket ever! You are definitely a gifted story teller, and you have a super special family!

Kelli said...

You are a great story teller! With 2 girls in glasses, I know how it is to be able to see the world clearly. Also, the rain boots are adorable. Who wouldn't enjoy the rain in those cuties?

Leslie, the Home Maker said...

Maybe you can get her some glasses with whales on the side, and she'll be excited about glasses again?
Great story!
I loved it and laughed at it- I have a "faker", too!


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