Saturday, February 26, 2011

Locked Out

I locked myself out of my house this week.

Again.

It happened the same way that it always does. I head out the door for some shopping, shut the door behind me, and double check for the essentials.

Purse…
Phone…
Shiny red Kodak…
Keys…


Seriously?

My blond key moments are so notorious that the husband specifically hid an extra key in the garage just to avoid the hysterical long distance phone calls. The system was working just fine until a rash of recent burglaries made me nervous that some intruder could find our key in his clever hiding place.

Which really isn’t so very clever, in my opinion…

So as I was leaving for school recently, I removed that secret key and took it along for the ride. Not to worry, though,  I knew exactly where it was currently hiding.

In the car.
Which was also locked.

I had three choices:
Call a locksmith, too expensive…
Call the Duchess to bring her key, too time consuming...
Or break in to my house.

I chose door number three.

Since I’m a confirmed scaredy-cat, I generally keep that house locked up as tight as a drum. I tried anyway, however, walking around Jericho and testing every conceivable entry.

Yup. Locked.

I considered marching around six more times and blowing a trumpet, but finally I tried the kitchen window. Eureka! It was unlocked. It’s a little higher and smaller than the rest, but still doable.

So I pushed it open.
And I pushed…
And. I.  pushed


Have you seen Winnie the Pooh and the Honey Tree?


Yeah, well so have I. Therefore, the kitchen window was not an option. (Boy, do I miss Miss Whimsy…)

Since I was as yet still unwilling to break a window, I had no choice but to MacGyver my way in through a locked door with a dead bolt. For obvious reasons, I have some experience with this. I chose the French doors since historically speaking, it’s easiest to invade through France.

All told, I worked on Project Break- In for over an hour, trying just about any tool I could pilfer from the garage. I would have gotten really testy had it not been for the blog post I was writing in my head and that outside refrigerator.

But finally, that magical combination of screwdriver, paint can opener, and prayer did the trick. I was in.
By that time, I had lost all interest in shopping.

And that’s why the husband's honey-do list this weekend includes putting silicone on that sticky kitchen window. And  why mine  includes creating a super dooper hidey hole for that spare key.

Oh please tell me that someone can relate...

37 comments:

Heather T. said...

Oh, yes, Debbie....I'm sure you won't be surprised to hear that I can relate. I'm always leaving my keys inside.

Mevely317 said...

This is soooo funny ... what I wouldn't give to have seen a video! (Would you consider giving us a tutorial in MacGyver-101?)
It's been a "few" years, but as a teen I once broke a dining room window to get inside .... wrong, wrong, wrong!
Couldn't help chuckling when another "few" years later my diminutive 83-y/o mom locked herself out and resorted to breaking/entering through her kitchen window - over and across the kitchen sink! Where there's a will ....

elizabeth said...

LOL!!! You always make me laugh my friend, which is a good thing.I especially enjoyed the Jericho part about marching around your house.
You make my heart happy... :)

Janette@Janette's Sage said...

I am laughing soooooooooo hard!!!! For one you can laugh at yourself...I will remember that this coming week, and two you can write it so I feel I am there right beside you...what a gift! Winnie the Pooh...oh know that story so well!!! Love you had a camera to take pictures of the keys inside..quick thinking...LOL

NO I haven't done this, but twice this year, in my menopausal mind fog.....where I told everyone in advance..."caution my brain is not working"..I did lock my keys in the car while trying to get my four year old out of the way of traffic...I must tell it some day...because even with my alarm going off, while I had a board stuck through the door...not one male at the ball field try to help me!!! The second time I did it...again at the ball field...well my husband goes to get in and every woman and man come to his assistants...what is wrong with that picture??

You have a great week...this will stay with me all week...which means I better get ready to laugh at myself.

ButterYum said...

Lol - my mother-in-law can relate. She was sunbathing on the deck one day when her husband left the house, accidentally locking the sliding glass door after he peeked out to say goodbye. My MIL was in a bikini (very private back yard - would never wear it in public), and she told me there was no way she was about to traipse over the neighbors so scantily clad, so she broke a window to get in. I still giggle when I think of the look on her face when she said there was no way she'd walk to the neighbors house in that condition. I can totally understand how she felt.

Grace on the Narrow Path said...

Oh Debbie you are too funny!!! Everytime I visit here I can see a "I Love Lucy" rerun play in my head ... except it's Debbie not Lucy. Thank you my friend for making me have a belly laugh this morning.
Oh yea I bet your neighbors are laughing too!!!
God bless you and keep a key with you at all time.
Hugs,
Bren

Patti said...

OH, Debbie, I've missed your fabulous blog. But now that I'm getting into a routine with college, I'm trying to get back to blogging a bit more.

This was a great story!!! I love the visual of Winnie the Pooh!!!

Good thing there wasn't a police officer driving down the road at the time. He might have thought you were a burglar and arrested you...or at the very least questioned you.

I don't think I've ever locked myself out of my house...my car, yes, many times. And that is more than enough.

Have a great weekend.

Love,
Patti

Honey at 2805 said...

Must confess, I can relate (and I'm really a brunette under all these highlights). Have happily just become your friend and follower!

Canadagirl said...

There is a reason us out in the country don't trust locks, lol. I gave a extra chuckle of whinne the pooh scene. I would have been winnie myself in that situation. *grin* I think the extra good hide-y idea is a good thing.

Blessings and ((HUGS))!
-Mary

Joan said...

Yep, I can relate. With me it was locking myself out of my van at the gas station. All the important things were inside...keys, cell phone, wallet. (Thankfully, I had already paid for my gas with the old debit card before pumping.) The station attendant (this was at a Wal-Mart station) was kind enough to allow me to use the phone to call my husband. He was on the road about 30-40 miles away. (The time it took for him to get to the station, seemed like he was 400 miles away!)

In the meantime, I had to direct traffic away from that pump, and explain my predicament to everyone. Fortunately, everyone was nice and understanding.

John told me to get an extra key and hide it underneath in one of those magnetic holders, but do you think I've listend???

Thanks for a good chuckle today (at your expense) :)

Gayle said...

Hilarious! And yes, I can relate. That's why I have a super, duper, ain't-nobody-gonna-find hiding spot for my spare key! Loved the story though. ;-)

Miss Merry said...

The first week we bought our house (January 1978) I brought my baby daughter in first, put her in the playpen, put my purse on the table and closed the door (so she wouldn't get a draft) while I went out to get the groceries. Well, the door had a goofy lock that automatically locked when you closed the door. I questioned the vigilance of my new neighbors when I had to put a brick through the window on my kitchen storm door. After a few more times, we replaced the window with plexi-glass - so that I could just pop it out. For the next few years, my agile, skinny youngsters could climb the tree and jimmy the bedroom window, jump in and land on the bed and let us in. They were so good at this that my neighbors would borrow them to "unlock" their own houses. Recently I got a new car with the "lock-thing" on the key chain. AND automatic start and defrost. Well, no match for the snow this winter, I started my car from in the building at work, went out and put my purse in it 10 minutes later, got the snow brush out and shut the door. A few minutes later, I was alone in the parking lot. The car stopped running, the keys and keys to the building were on the front seat in my purse (with my cell phone). I had to break into the building (which is two towns away) and call my husband who said "So do you want me to bring you my car keys or what). No, honey, I will just spend the night in the warehouse :) SISTERHOOD!

Happier Than a Pig in Mud said...

Not a fun day! Yep, I hid a key too. A bigger problem for me is twice now I've lost my keys while trying on clothes at stores. I keep them in my jeans pocket and they fell out. Very scary to not be able to find them, once it took days before I got the call that someone finally turned them into Customer Service... Just one more reason I don't like clothes shopping:@)

Lynn Richards said...

I for one, am so glad you didn't forget your CAMERA. Cause then we wouldn't have this extraordinary post to read today. I have a child that would lock us out of the house...with her in it. She also would do this to the neighbors. Did I have a spare key anywhere? Uh-uh. I would just lose my mind over and over while I would bang on the door and threaten her within an inch of her life. Not such productive parenting moments for me. However, when she would lock herself into the bathroom, I did have a little allen wrench key for that. So my blood pressure didn't go up quite as high during those escapades. Thank goodness she grew out of it.
I do like the Jericho approach, though. But your house would have really been a mess if it worked.
xo
lynn
p.s.
i accepted the "stylish" challenge and listed 7 random things about me. Read it while in the bathroom.

gnee @ Singing With Birds said...

Oh you are so funny. I'm imaging you hunting for that wonderful hiding spot right now! Just a little suggestion from me, "Think outside the box!"

My guy can really relate. He needs a purse, but refuses to carry anything remotely like one, and I actually appreciate that fact! Still his pockets are unsightly and he looses everything.

Thanks for reminding me we need to hide a key as our windows will not open. Just for the exercise and me, march around your house 6 more times! Love you....;D

Carol said...

Great picture. I see your keys lying innocently on the kitchen counter. Which makes it worse. It's like they are lying there taunting you.
No, I don't lock myself out of my car or my house. I guess it's a gift.
I do other things, however, that make up for it!
Like put the lasagne in for dinner and not check it for an hour later when it is dinner time. That's when I noticed...the oven wasn't turned on. Like that.

Ann said...

LOL .... I'd relate, but I'm laughing too hard!

Kathleen said...

Oh yeah, I've been there. Felt that awful sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach when I realised what I'd done... again! Not much fun is it? In this house we can only lock the door by turnng a key, it's much better that way. Glad you had your camera with you, great picture!

Anita said...

I can totally relate, lol!!! We have spare keys at my parents, but we have to locate their spare keys to get in to get ours if they are not there which is always the case if we get locked out. I too am very paranoid someone will find a key, but they would have to have xray vision. Glad that you got in ok!! I love how you turn something bad around and make it seem so funny:-)

Sonja said...

I'm laughing right alongside of you! I can just picture you with the wrong tools, as you prayed and pushed and jimmied!! Yeah, I can see why the joy went right out of the shopping trip!! :)

Sharon Kirby said...

Oh my gosh, Debbie - I'm not kidding. I am laughing the hardest I have ever laughed at this one. This would be in my Top Ten of my favorite Debbie posts.

Where to start?

The photographic subtlety of the through-the-window picture of the lonely keys. Chuckle...

The husband's "secret" hiding place. Snicker...

The Winnie-the-Pooh picture. Chortle... (BTW, I felt an uncontrollable urge to throw a dart at Winnie's little sticking-out butt.)

The timely use of MacGyver as a verb. Shoulders starting to jiggle...

The France reference. Gut-busting guffaw... This one sent me over the edge.

I have a plethora of locked key stories - maybe I'll post one of mine. A super dooper hidey hole - Hmmm. Have to ponder that one. Of course, if I suggest a spot, and that's what you decide to use - well, all of Blog Land will know about it...

Maybe you could tape an extra key to your camera - after all, you never go ANYWHERE without your shiny red Kodak, do you??

GOD BLESS!

Ms.Daisy said...

Debbie,
Thank you for the huge laugh this one gave me! I have locked myself out of my house and had to call the locksmith - yeah, very expensive. I've also locked myself out of my car with the motor running - good thing a store empoloyee knew how to use a wire coat hanger to get the door open for me! I loved the reference of going through France AND doing a Jericho around your house with a trumpet! LOL! You made my day.


~Jean

BFM said...

This summer I locked myself and my 4 kids out of the house and we were all in our pajamas!! I can relate!!

Gail @ Faithfulness Farm said...

LOL...I can so totally relate. I did this a couple of years ago...I came home on my lunch hour from work and locked my keys in the house when I went to leave. I ended up at my elderly neighbors -- who were THRILLED to have a captive audience - i mean company for the afternoon, lol. Long story short, it was about 2 hours before my knight in shining armour was able to come save me, lol. Glad you got in ... eventually ;)

Blessings!
Gail

At The Picket Fence said...

I think you should have tried walking around 6 more times and then shouting "Hootie Hoo"...that's Biblical right? :-) This is absolutely hysterical! I just have to tell you that someone linked up to our party this weekend and the entire time I was reading her post I was thinking, "she and Debbie need to be friends". Her blog is called You Are Talking Too Much and she is hilarious just like you my friend! Pop over and pay her a visit if you get a chance. :-)
Vanessa
P.S. Her site is http://youaretalkingtoomuch.blogspot.com

Chatty Crone said...

Looks like there are a lot of us that can relate to you out there.

My house is lokced tight too - finally had to break a garage door window!

Glas you finally got in!

sandie♥

CAL said...

HAAAAAAAAAAAAA = my favorite line....it is easier to invade through France. I'm still laughing!

By the way, I purchased a secret rock for the secret key. The rock was disguised so well that I had to add a color paint dot to find it.

Crickit said...

Really cute post! I'm glad you had your camera so you could capture the moment! I have never locked myself out of my house... just my car!

Linda W said...

Bahahaaaa....oh, yes, I've done this but not lately. However, tomorrow I'm having spare keys made and finding the perfect hiding place. Your (funny) experience is telling me that my time is just around the corner.

Dayle said...

Yes, dear funny friend, I USED to could relate, many years ago. But after locking myself out for the third or more time, I created a super duper hiding spot for that spare key and it's worked like a charm every since.

laurie @ bargain hunting said...

Oh My Gosh Debbie, you've brought me to tears again! Do you make this stuff up just so you'll have a great blog post? You are just a riot! How I'd love to spend some time just listening to your stories. I'm glad I get to do that via your blog. That problem was completely solved for me when we moved into our current home. The doors require that you have your door key to lock them from the outside. My car, office, and home keys are on the same chain, so if I can lock the door before I leave, I have my keys with me! We won't talk about how many times I locked myself out in our previous home. laurie

Denise said...

Awww. I'm so sorry you locked yourself out. Again. Sounds like the blog creation helped keep the frustration and scaredy cat away. Thankfully the French are such weaklings and you had the Kodak to get some action shots. I laughed all the way through. I just love your humor.

Hope you find a new hiding place for that extra key.

xinex said...

The pictures of you in my imagination as I read your story would make a good movie, lol. I am so sorry you were locked out but glad you finally found a way in. I am hoping it does not happen to me. But should it happen, hubby just works 5 min away, so I can easily get him. I make sure to keep more than 1 door unlocked when I go out to garden. Now if I have to go out to drive, I keep the keys with me so I can press the clicker in my key chain to set the home alarm. So, I usually do not get locked out....Christine

FrouFrouBritches said...

Bless your heart! You are so funny! I love the Pooh reference. HA! I'm a big scaredy cat too and REFUSE to leave a key hidden outside. No way, Hosea! Love the picture of the kitchen through the window. So funny! Glad you finally got in!

Angel said...

Oh yes, unfortunately, I can relate! Thanks for the chuckle. :)

Jennie said...

Not sure you'll see this comment or not since you've moved on to a new post that I have yet to read...but.... My favorite thing about this, was the image of Pooh stuck in the window. I quite literally laughed out loud. Though, really, I shouldn't. I doubt I could make it through a window if I had to!

I'm pretty paranoid, especially when I'm by myself. I call it an active imagination though. It sounds better when you spin it that way!

Glad you made it in. Maybe you should have called the Duchess after all! ;) (You know you've been in GA a long time when the only way you could think of to say that was "Might should have...")

I'm much more likely to lock my keys in the car. (Knocking on wood RIGHT now.)

Kelli said...

Wish I could have seen you going through the hassle of breaking in!! I have locked my keys out of my car countless times. I have only been locked out of my house once by my 2 year old. Hide that key girl!!!

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